Brian May: Astro Slacker, plus McCarren Park Rocks, Axl Rose Blackmailed, Bob Dylan Back on the Diamond, Billy Bragg and MySpace

• Brian May is finally going to complete is PhD, as he is planning to finish his thesis on zodiacal dust. Took you long enough, Brian!
• Brooklyn has turned an old needle and condom repository into a concert venue. And it's about time.
• Axl Rose has accused the Swedish police of blackmail. They wouldn't concede that he bit that guy's leg for the fans.
• Recent Baseball Hall of Fame inductee Bob Dylan will do another tour of minor-league ballparks this summer. Sounds like a little quid pro quo to me.
• Billy Bragg seems to have kicked MySpace's ass. Then bragged about it, of course.
  

Kevin Spacey as Christopher Walken as Han Solo

There's nothing much going on today, so I thought I'd just give you this oldie but goodie. "These tracks are side by side!"

Gene Simmons' Girlfriend Is Not Immoral, plus Pretenders Honored, Prince's Secret Show, Madonna at the Garden, Jack Stations

• Gene Simmons was being sued or was suing some ex-girlfriend for calling her immoral or something. Anyhow, it's all settled now, and her reputation has been restored.
• Iggy Pop and Incubus will be among the artists celebrating the Pretenders for a VH1 show. How great is it in "Middle of the Road" when she makes that cat noise before the harmonica solo?
• Prince played another secret late-night show. Word is that it was funky.
• Madonna played at the Garden and the New York Times was there. I seem to remember that I saw Madonna at the Garden too. Something about her being a uniter, not a diva...
• Advanced music critic Greg Milner wrote something about those one-word-name radio stations for Slate. Hey, that's a one-word-name website. Connection?
  

Dylan in the Hall of Fame, plus Creamfields Cut Footloose, Hunter S. Thompson Estate Sued, Corgan and Love Roomies, iPod Cancels "Top of the Pops"

• Bob Dylan has been added to the Baseball Hall of Fame. I'm starting to think that baseball might be the most Advanced sport.
• Police to Creamfields: You can dance if you want to, you can leave your neighbors behind.
• An ex-assistant is suing the Hunter S. Thompson estate. The woman wants the settlement shot out of a cannon.
• Billy Corgan and Courtney Love are reportedly living together. Apparently he has taken to brushing her teeth for her because she wasn't doing it in rhythm.
• The BBC didn't kill Top of the Pops, the iPod did. Maybe they should have changed the name to Top of the Pods. (Am I crazy, or is that actually a good idea? Perhaps the name of a column?)

Yoko Stands Up for Paul and Heather, plus Brandon Flowers v. Emo, Sleater v. Kinney, Pope v. Guitars, Jeff Buckley Biopic, More Beatles and Cirque

• Yoko Ono thinks everyone should leave Paul McCartney and Heather Mills alone. She added, "If anyone is going to take cheap shots at them, it should be me."
• Brandon Flowers doesn't like Emo, saying he would like to "beat all those bands to death." He can't actually do that because while he has soul, he's not a soldier.
• Sleater-Kinney are going on an indefinite hiatus. First Star Jones leaves The View and now this?
• The Pope hates guitars. He should smash them like Pete Townshend, I think.
• There is a Jeff Buckley biopic in the works. It was only a matter of time for that one.
• The New York Times has a slide show of the Beatles/Cirque production. I wasn't aware that George Martin and his son did what amounts to a remix for the show. Kinda cool.

About the Advanced Theory: There Are No Bad Songs

As I said earlier today, I've finally gotten around to the first part of Bob Dylan's autobiography. So far, I've been struck with how open-minded he was, even when he was at his most Overt (when he first arrived to New York). He talks about admiring boxers and military men, listening to Roy Orbison on the radio, not getting but liking Faulkner, and being comforted by an approving glance from Gorgeous George. He quotes "Candle in the Wind" without a whiff of irony. Best of all, he says that there are no bad songs. I think that is central to the Advanced state of mind. A lot of people think that the Advanced Theory is just an excuse to like crappy music. That may be so, but from my perspective, it is more fruitful and interesting to find a way to like everything than to dismiss music because it doesn't meet some arbitrary standard. What is the negative result of liking every song? It doesn't prevent good music from being written because the great musicians aren't really affected by what people want to hear. And it doesn't mean you have bad taste because liking everything means you like everything that someone with "good taste" likes. So even though you may be the world's greatest old-school hip-hop aficionado, the person who likes everything has you beat because he likes everything you like, plus Mississippi Fred MacDowell, Joy Division, Stravinsky, Lawrence Welk, Henry Mancini, C+C Music Factory, Swing Out Sister, Rites of Spring, Let's Active, George Jones, Nina Simone, Elis Regina, Rick Astley, Starship, and Vanilla Ice. Another point that I think is important is that Advanced Artists don't try to kill their idols, they try to carry on the spirit that made their idols worthy of being idolized. But I might have to get into that later.

Tower Has a Name Problem, plus Richard E. Grant the DJ, Coyne Shortens Richard Ashcroft's Name, Brand New Heavies, President Bush Has Nerve

• Coolfer has some comments on the Digital Service That Must Not Be Named.
• Richard E. Grant is going to be a DJ. Not the Junior Vasquez kind, though.
• Wayne Coyne thinks Richard Ashcroft is a "pompous dick." Shouldn't that "d" be capitalized?
• The Brand New Heavies are brand-new again. My favorite three words (when grouped together): "acid," "jazz," "collective."
• President Bush honored black musicians to celebrate black music month. That reminds me of the Onion article "Man enjoys listening to, causing the blues."

Andrew W.K. Times Three, plus Here Comes the Soleil, Axl Rose Betters Mike Tyson, Tori Amos Box Set, "Bob Dylan Encyclopedia"

• Now here's what I'm talking about: Andrew W.K. has three (!) albums coming out. Kudos to you, sir.
• If you're excited about the Beatles/Cirque de Soleil collaboration, you have George Harrison to thank.
• Axl Rose was arrested in Sweden for biting a security guard's leg. Where do we go now?
• Tori Amos is releasing a "career-spanning" box set. By the way, if you haven't heard her covers album, Strange Little Girls, you should. It is breathtakingly something.
• Read all about the Bob Dylan Encyclopedia here. More to come on Mr. Dylan (I'm finally getting around to his autobiography).

Pet Shop Boys at the Disco, plus Tower Download Service, Jumbo-Shrimp Moby vs. Factory Farming, Beck New and Old(elay), Highway Star

• The Pet Shop Boys are into disco again. I never thought about this, but I guess these old techno guys are going to replace the rock dinosaurs as the elder statesmen of popular music. Maybe they'll even invent a new form of Advancement?
• Tower has launched its own downloading service. Shawn Fanning must be rolling over in his grave.
• Moby is doing what he can to prevent suffering on factory farms. He's right to do it, but I'm always pulling for the oxymoron.
• MTV has all the news on Beck's upcoming record. And guess who's almost 10? Odelay! Get out your credit card.
• Speaking of milestones, happy 50th anniversary, Interstate Highway System! Can't wait for the hi-def re-release to celebrate the occasion. Now more expensive!
  

The Residents' "River of Crime," plus Kraftwerk on eBay, "Control" Soundtrack, Learning to Krall, Michael Jackson and Bob Dylan, Creative Commons

• The Residents would like to sell you two blank CDs. River of crime indeed!
• You can get Kraftwerk's original vocoder on eBay.
• Confirmed for the soundtrack for Control, the Ian Curtis movie: David Bowie, Roxy Music, Iggy Pop, Buzzcocks, Lou Reed, and Sex Pistols. Unconfirmed: Hanson.
• Diana Krall and Elvis Costello are expecting a baby. I wonder if you learn to crawl more quickly if your mom's name is Krall.
• Michael Jackson performing with Bob Dylan in Ireland sounds wonderful, but did it happen?
• From the New York Times: "an unusual global alliance of artists, scientists and lawyers, meeting here over the weekend, has been working in recent years to forge a 'creative commons' that allows artists to decide which rights they want to retain and which they would rather share." Sounds interesting and boring. Can someone read the article and tell me what it says?
  

Deluxe Edition of "Coney Island Baby" in August

There is a 30th-anniversary edition of Coney Island Baby coming out August 15. The album came right after Metal Machine Music, and the reaction to that album appears to have been very much on Lou Reed's mind when he started writing Baby. From Billboard:

"'Metal Machine Music had an unusually high number of returns and was taken off the market in three weeks,' Reed writes in the new liner notes. 'I had no money and no guitars. The roadies had taken them when they hadn't been paid. I was in debt to everyone including the musicians union. RCA put me up in a hotel while the future fell, to be decided.'"

Here are the extras:

• the B-side "Nowhere at All"
  
• "Downtown Dirt"
  
• "Leave Me Alone"
• Previously unreleased versions of "Crazy Feeling," "She's My Best Friend" and "Coney Island Baby" recorded with Doug Yule in January 1975.

Try and stop me from buying it!

Rod Stewart: I Check IDs, plus Old Smiths Get Deal, Aerosmith Hammers On, Frank Black Is Bald, Shyamalan Makes Bad Movies That Are Fun to Laugh At

• I can't tell: Is it cool to have your dad be your chaperone if he happens to be Rod Stewart?
• Mike Joyce and Andy Rourke just got signed to Blackburn College's label, On Song. If I had known that all you need to get signed is to have been in the Smiths, I would been in the Smiths instead of my college band, Spigot. Guess I'll just have to chalk it up to experience.
• Aerosmith is ready to make another record (and make rock poses for silly pictures in an empty room), even though Steven Tyler had throat surgery. Something to do with a 100-year-old hammer.
• Kingblind felt the need to note Frank Black's baldness in a review of his latest work. That's bad kharma.
• Not only does M. Night Shyamalan make the most enjoyable, laughably terrible movies you've ever enjoyed while not believing how incredibly stupid they are, he's also a dill-hole.
  

Roger Daltrey Is as Old as He Feels, plus Bay City Rollers Manager into Bling, "Rude Boy" DVD, Another Auction, Lou Reed Say, "Wha?"

• Roger Daltrey is allowed to live on a technicality.
• The manager of the Bay City Rollers is on trial for a drug offense, and he claims that he uses the scales in his bedroom to weigh his jewelry. He also added, "Every time I come around yo city, pinky ring worth about fifty, every time I buy a new ride, Bay City on Yokohama tires."
• The Clash's Rude Boy is coming to DVD. I prefer ZZ Top's "Rough Boy," but you have to take what they give you.
• Come to this auction for Michael Jackson's self-portrait, but leave with a Monkees tambourine.
• According to this, Lou Reed either didn't know Coldplay covered "Perfect Day" at Isle of Wight (he was there, too) or he pretended not to know. Either way, I'm satisfied.

Paul Morley Says Lou Reed Was a Difficult Interview

I came across this interview with Paul Morley (among other things, he designed the "Frankie says..." t-shirts), who says that Lou Reed was his most difficult interview. Listen to what the man says:

Q: Who has been most difficult to interview?
A: Lou Reed. I had to go through a series of auditions before he approved me to interview him. This was in 1979. He hated the music press and gave me 30min and he timed it. Halfway through a question, he picked up his watch and walked off. It's tough to meet one of your heroes and to have them be surly and horrible to you. I understood in the end. I was just there to do an interview but people such as Reed are aware that if they say something that might be interpreted in the wrong way, it will last forever.

Isn't it interesting that Morley was mad because Lou Reed gave him the amount of time he had agreed to give him? What a jerk musician! Sometimes I think rock journalists don't really understand how unimportant most musicians find them. Of course, they only think that after they become successful, but still. Anyway, it sounds like Morley has come around to Lou Reed's way of thinking, which is what we all will do eventually.

Andy Warhol Inspires Wiggers, plus Journey Reissues, Kris Kristofferson's Birthday, Volkswagen's Birthday, NME Grasping at Straws

• In the future, everyone's silver wigs will fetch $10,800 at auction.
• Journey reissues are coming, including their greatest hits collection. I would release that one last, if you catch my drift.
• Kris Kristofferson is celebrating his 70th birthday today with music. I'm celebrating my 35th birthday writing about Kris Kristofferson's 70th birthday.
• Kris, the Advanced Theory Blog, and I are not the only ones celebrating a birthday: The first Volkswagens were designed today in 1934. The project manager was the all-time worst person in history, but the car was good.
• NME wants you to write for them! No, not you, YOU.
  

Tom Petty Gets the Thumbs Up, plus Roger Waters Puts His Tag on a Wall, Seal Is Sued but Rich, VH1 "Honors" Elvis Costello, ATB Birthday

• The New York Times says Tom Petty is lean, hungry, and like a gladiator.
• Roger Waters channeled Ronald Reagan (or Bob Geldoff) in Bethlehem.
• If the settlement against him is any indication, Seal made tons of money from his first two records. I'm not ashamed to admit that I love "Crazy" by the way.
  
• Green Day’s Billie Joe Armstrong, Fiona Apple and Death Cab for Cutie will help VH1 honor Elvis Costello on Decades Rock Live. I guess that sounds like an honor.
• Also, it's the blog's second anniversary. I was thinking about re-releasing it on high-def and SurroundSound, then charging you more, but instead I'll just say thanks to all my regular readers and people who have linked to me.
  

George Harrison, Beach Boys Reissues

Not much going on this afternoon, but there are a couple of reissues (or a couple of re-I-can't-believe-I-have-to-buy-this-again-issues) that you might be interested in. First, George Harrison's ode to Madonna, Living in the Material World, will be out on CD and CD/DVD (now even more expensive!) with two additional tracks, the 1971 B-side "Deep Blue" and "Miss O'Dell," the B-side for "Give Me Love (Give Me Peace on Earth)." The other extras are marred by an Eric Clapton appearance.

Speaking of marred appearances, Brian Wilson and the Beach Boys are releasing "Good Vibrations" on CD single (now even more expensive!) to "celebrate" the 40th anniversary of the song. It will include "snippets from various sessions, an alternate take, an instrumental and a live rehearsal version recorded in August 1967 in Honolulu." And since Pet Sounds will also be 40, you can celebrate that anniversary by getting the CD/DVD package with mono, stereo and 5.1 Surround Sound mixes (now even more expensive!). You'll get a mono version of "Hang on to Your Ego" (mono Surround Sound--must be Advanced) and behind the scenes stuff. So get out your credit cards because you'll have to wait another ten years for the next round number. I wonder what format will be the rage then...

You Don't Have to Read My Rhyme to Know What I Have in Rhyme

For some reason, "Hot Blooded" by Foreigner has been in my head for weeks. I've sung it over and over in my head without really paying attention to the lyrics. I've heard them a thousand times after all. Anyway, the other day, this line absolutely cracked me up:

"You don't have to read my mind/To know what I have in mind."

That got me to thinking about the practice of using identical rhyme in songs and how completely awesome it is. Here are some that come to mind (and mostly to these people's minds):

• Beastie Boys, "Pass the Mic": "Everybody's rapping like it's a commercial/acting like life is a big commercial"
• Black Sabbath, "War Pigs": Generals gathered in their masses/just like witches at black masses"
• The Who, "Happy Jack": Happy jack wasn’t old, but he was a man/He lived in the sand at the Isle of Man"
• America, "Horse With No Name" (these lyrics are awesome in lots of ways): I been thru the desert on a horse with no name/it felt good to be out of the rain/In the desert, you can remember your name/'Cause there ain't no-one for to give you no pain"
• But I think you can guess my favorite example: "But she never lost her head/Even when she was givin' head"

Now that is Advanced Genius at work. If I got any lyrics wrong, forgive me, and if you know of other songs with identical rhyme, please write in!

Very Little Known Facts: Rather Ripped

The good folks at Very Little Known Facts (my favorite new blog and not just because I know the people who run it), have asked me to participate in a debate. The topic is: Who is more ripped? Brad Pitt in Fight Club or Christian Bale in American Psycho/Batman Begins? I take the position that Brad Pitt is more ripped, while Jon at VLKF sides with Christian Bale. Read both arguments and decide for yourself!

Bono, Sting, Lou Reed, Nick Cave in Rogue's Gallery, plus Izzy and GN'R, Jello Biafra, Leonard Cohen Doc, Advanced Keytar

• Gore Verbisnki and Johnny Depp got Bono, Sting, Lou Reed, and Nick Cave to contribute to Rogue's Gallery: Pirate Ballads, Sea Songs & Chanteys (well, Verbinski and Depp had the idea, Hal Wilner got the talent). That's quite a lot of Advancement!
• You can't keep Izzy Stradlin away from GN'R these days. Also, if you click the link, please appreciate the picture of Axl Rose.
• Jello Biafra has a new spoken-word album coming out, and he's asking fans to design the cover. He's an Overt man in many ways, but at the same time, there's something Advanced about him, don't you think?
• USA Today gives the Leonard Cohen documentary I'm Your Man three stars. Which could mean anything.
• Thanks to Music Thing for showing us what the world's most Advanced instrument (in the right hands) looks like.

Kenny Rogers: Just Dropped in to See What Condition My Online-Gambling Empire Is In

A friend of Advancement heard an interview with Kenny Rogers about his online gambling business, which is based in Belize. As you may know, Rogers got into a little trouble with the law because of his gambling, but shot his way out of it (actually the charges were dropped). According to the interview, he now has set his sights on developing some innovative technology that will revolutionize Internet gambling (embracing new technology is Advanced as is being a good businessman). The fun part about all this is that, like the Beach Boys who didn't surf, he's a gambler doesn't actually gamble: "I can't win enough to excite me, but I can lose enough to depress me," he says. He and Jimmy Buffet should get together and buy a baseball team or something. Or maybe a laid-back alternative to Wal-Mart?

Now Johnny Cash Has Been Everywhere, plus the Who at Glastonbury, Frank Black Fakes It, Martin Short on Broadway, "Top of the Pops" Popped

• Hear Johnny Cash's last song on MySpace. The world has changed a tad in the last fifty or so years.
• Pete Townshend wants the Who to headline Glastonbury next July. It's going to be hard to top Kylie Minogue (though it might be fun to try).
• Frank Black says the songs he tried to write for the Pixies sound kind of "fakey." I can almost guarantee that most people would like those songs better than what he has done as a solo artist. Not because they're better, mind you.
• You're going to have to wait one more week to catch Martin Short on Broadway. Meanwhile, I'm on Broadway right now!
• Top of the Pops is getting the axe after 42 years. Maybe if they had more axe, the show would still be going strong.

Lou Reed in Ecstasy, plus Razorlight and the Stones, Elton John Overvalued, Paul Simon and Brian Eno, Replacements Retrospective, Robot Worm

• According to the Guardian, Lou Reed's Gateshead show was "infuriating, thought-provoking, challenging and occasionally breathtaking." Also, he showed up 30 minutes late and played "Ecstasy" for 25 minutes. You just can't top him.
• Razorlight will be among the bands people will wish would stop playing on the upcoming Rolling Stones tour.
• Elton John is suing "U.S. tax authorities" for overvaluing his condo in Atlanta. That's funny because people have accused me of overvaluing his music for years and I've never heard from his lawyers.
• Paul Simon talks to USA Today about making his latest record with Brian Eno and others. But no pie chart, unfortunately.
• The New York Times is interested in the Replacements in retrospect. Also, whoever created the link must know his replacements. Have a look.
• Finally a robot that can do the worm for real. It's about time.

Little Ditty About Joseph Conrad

There is not much going on out there in the Advanced World, so if you'll allow me, I thought I'd share with you my favorite John Cougar chorus written by Joseph Conrad (from "Youth: A Narrative"):

"I remember my youth and the feeling that will never come back any more--the feeling that I could last forever, outlast the sea, the earth, and all men; the deceitful feeling that lures us on to joys, to perils, to love, to vain effort--to death; the triumphant conviction of strength, the heat of life in the handful of dust, the glow in the heart that with every year grows dim, grows cold, grows small, and expires--and expires, too soon, too soon--before life itself."

Hold on to sixteen as long as you can!

Paul McCartney's B'day Present, "Kill Your Idols," Bush and Radiohead, Griff Calls Out 50 Cent, 50 Cent Develops Computers

• Paul McCartney's grandkids planned to record their own version of "When I'm 64" with different words for his birthday. But he said they didn't have the chops and recorded it by himself. One of his grandkids said, "If he doesn't want me to play anything, I won't play anything."
• The movie Kill Your Idols has been picked up for distribution. There is no more Overt statement than "kill your idols."
• Radiohead gets the Bush family's full approval.
• Professor Griff (Public Enemy) is upset that 50 Cent's movie was a "step-by-step instruction in how to be a thug" sent out to children. True, but...
• 50 Cent is teaming up with Apple to produce a new home computer that will be inexpensive enough for poor children to afford them. Advantage: 50 Cent.

T.F.T.A.: T.S.O.L. on MySpace

I don't have time to do my usual roundup of the day's news, but I will leave you with this: I watched a documentary on West Coast punk (is that Overt or Advanced of me?) and was impressed with Jack Grisham of T.S.O.L. I'm also impressed that they have a MySpace page. I wouldn't say I'm any great fan of theirs, but why don't you check it out anyway. Who knows, maybe we'll all grow to love them all over again together.

"The Fireman Song" - Derek and Clive

Dudley Moore sings a song about being a very bad fireman (contains bad words, so beware). It comes from Derek and Clive Get the Horn.

"Gong Show" Juggler

Oh, how I loved the Gong Show. This juggler is probably not the best juggler in the world (though maybe she is, who knows?), but her act is pure genius. Enjoy.

Prince Surprise, plus Stax Back? RIAA vs. YouTube, Sex Pistols Spunk, Mick Jagger and Tom Stoppard, Lou Reed at Blues & Brews

• Prince was a surprise guest at the opening of Celebrate Brooklyn. Even more surprising, he was on Good Morning America at seven this morning. I wonder: Do you stay up all night for a 7 AM gig?
• Will Stax be reborn? And will Justin Timberlake be the daddy?
• The folks at the RIAA hate children. Or do they?
• The Sex Pistols' "legendary bootleg" Spunk is going to be released in its original form. Don't tell the RIAA!
• Mick Jagger has expressed interest in the movie rights to Tom Stoppard's Rock'n'Roll (Advanced name). Meanwhile, Stoppard's next play will be a staged version of Freejack.
• Lou Reed is going to play the Telluride Blues and Brews Festival. Man, that's a really Advanced name.

Frank Black Goes Foo, plus Paige/Plant at the Festivals, Ugly White Stripes Suit, 100 Greatest British Rock Albums, I Justify My Love for You

• Frank Black will play some extra dates as a headliner in addition the ones he is already playing as the opener for the Foo Fighters. Wait, that has to be in reverse.
• Jimmy Paige and Robert Plant are hitting the summer festivals, only not together. Now that's what I call selfish.
• Things are getting ugly forthe White Stripes, and I don't mean Meg White's drumming.
• I am the God of Hell Fire, and I bring you Classic Rock magazine's top 100 greatest British rock albums. Don't look for Jimi Hendrix.
• If you like Martin Lawrence but not Coleridge (or vice versa), read this now. For the record, I don't find it necessary or even possible to justify why I like something. I prefer telling people why they would be justified in liking the things I like.

Hacking and Cracking With Pete Townshend

There is a little story in Billboard about the near future of the Who. Here are two interesting bits:

"This selection [the mini opera 'Wine and Glass'] is 11 minutes long, we will blast through it, and if the crowd gets distracted they can buy our fabulous merchandising."

...and...

"Townshend has hinted at, but not revealed, 'a very cool idea for how to launch our new record using the Web. If we can pull it off it will entirely change the way the music industry operates. If you are a Russian or Chinese Internet music seller, or a bootlegger, and you are refusing to pay a share of what you charge your customers to the artists who made the music, my cunning plan will ruin your year.'"

I had no idea that Townshend was into programming, but his master plan sure sounds amazing. But beware: Advanced Artists love to make grand proclamations that they forget about immediately. (Remember when Madonna's new record was supposed to sound like Franz Ferdinand? And remember when Townswed said that this record would take another five years to record?) If I had to bet, I'd say nothing will come of this.

Union Not Happy With Springsteen, plus Leonard Cohen Documentary, EMI and YouTube, iTunes and Weird Al, Ramones Musical, Beatles Downloads

• A local union is not too happy that Bruce Springsteen will be playing Pete Seeger's music in a non-union venue. Of course, union guys never get along with the Boss.
• Here's a review of the Leonard Cohen documentary I'm Your Man. Apparently he's the reviewer's man, but may not be everybody's man.
• Will EMI save YouTube by destroying it?
• Meanwhile, iTunes is destroying Weird Al. (I just happened to have listened to "Polkas on 45" this morning!)
• Gabba Gabba Hey! - A Punk-Rock Musical is going to London. Hey, ho, I'd go.
• Will we ever be able to download the Beatles legally? Ringo Starr is vaguely encouraging.

From USA's "Night Flight": Malcolm McLaren's "Punk It Up (I'm a Sex Pistol)"

I'll let the poster describe this one: "Rare clip, taken from USA Night Flight's Video Profile. Grainy quality, unfortunately." It also has a vertical-hold problem every once in a while, but I must say this is quite Advanced. For one, it shows that McLaren embraced World Music (which is big for the Advanced), but also because he says he is a Sex Pistol, even though he really wasn't. This is good stuff. Might as well try "Buffalo Gals" while you're at it.

Ric Ocasek Gets Brazilian, plus Sonic Youth at CBGB, DeNiro Produces Missy Elliot, Hail! Hail! Chuck Berry, Boston Shall Be Re-Released

• Ric Ocasek worked as producer on the upcoming Brazilian Girls record and played guitar on one of the tracks. Anyone want to bet his part included palm muting?
• Sonic Youth played a show at CBGB to open their tour for Rather Ripped. Sounds rather Overt, but I'll bet it was pretty good.
• Robert DeNiro is set to produce a Missy Elliot biopic. I love it, but when did he go crazy?
• In case you didn't know, Chuck Berry has a dark side. Plus, he's Advanced. (After all, he did practically invent the use of Johnny, the most Advanced name in rock.)
• The first two Boston albums are going to be re-released. I have to ask: Has there ever been a better-looking band than Boston?

Vincent "Prince Vince" Gallo on "Graffiti Rock"

Here is Vincent Gallo a long time ago. I've talked about Advanced Irritants, but I wonder if Gallo might be an Overt Irritant. Or maybe he's something else altogether. Anyway, it's always great to see actors when they were young and fly, so I had to give him a blog job.

Live Lou Reed Review

There is an amusing review of a recent Lou Reed concert in the Manchester Evening News. Here are the highlights:

"clad in grey slinky top and trousers, which looked only one step removed from a track-suit...[b]acked by a robust band of virtuosos who were as comfortable using bows on their basses as they were plucking them, he opened with a tedious jam that bordered on the sadistic."

...and...

"as with everything Reed does, there are breath-taking highs and lows from one song to the next.... Crikey, one number even saw the appearance of a Chinese-looking Tai-chi chappy going through his moves. Go-go it wasn't."

But Advanced it surely was.

The Who's New Mini-Opera, plus Beach Boys Reunite, New Cars Take a Break, Wal-Mart Gets Explicit, "Young Frankenstein" on Broadway

• The Who have confirmed the release of an eleven-song mini-opera, due this summer. I don't think I have to tell you how Advanced this could be.
• The surviving members of the Beach Boys assembled to celebrate some things. Maybe they should tour with Pink Floyd?
• The New Cars/Blondie tour has to take a break because Elliot Easton broke his clavicle in a tour-bus incident (he's one of my favorite guitarists, by the way). And just when they could have gotten an extra push from the success of Cars!
• Wal-Mart is considering allowing their customers to buy music they like, even if it contains dirty words.
• Mel Brooks is busy at work on a musical version of Young Frankenstein. Whoever will be playing the monster will have some large shoes to fill.

The Germs Hitting the Road, plus New York Dolls Probed, Bob Dylan Is Very Contemporary, Perry Farrell Not Extreme, Canceling AOL

• The Germs are back. With a guy from ER as their frontman.
• Finally, a chance to probe the New York Dolls.
• Here's what Columbia Records Chairman Steven Barnett (or his p.r. firm) says about Bob Dylan's next album: "Bob is that rare artist whose music defies all trends and resonates throughout all levels of our culture, and he continues to be as contemporary and relevant as any artist in music." Does contemporary come in degrees?
• Perry Farrell didn't know that his new guitarist was in Extreme. Sounds to me that Farrell got cold feet about what could have been a very Advanced move.
• It's pretty hard to cancel AOL. Just ask Ted Turner. Or you can listen to this guy.

Lou Reed: Wighting for the Man (Short-Sleeve Leather Edition)

As I said yesterday, Lou Reed's performance at Isle of Wight might have signified a new phase of Advancement. We already knew about the Tai Chi master, but it seems as though he has altered the original Advanced uniform (dark sunglasses, long hair in the back, black leather jacket. Specifically, he has now moved on to the black leather short-sleeve shirt (see right). Very exciting!

Thanks to Goldenfiddle.

Lou Reed Thinking XXX

Somehow I missed this one:

"Looking for a change, photographer Timothy Greenfield-Sanders started a series of portraits of porn stars, to be displayed in pairs – clothed and unclothed. Thinking XXX is a sort of bonus feature to his show, a documentary that cuts between the photos shoots and interviews with his subjects, as well as a slightly idiosyncratic group of talking heads who are, one supposes, supposed to provide the 'Thinking' part of the title."

Why is it strange I missed it? Well:

"The talking head segments are a mixed bag; author Gore Vidal doesn’t have much new to say; director John Waters does, with characteristic wry humour. The best of all doesn’t even appear in the film, but as a group of bonus extended interviews – singer Lou Reed reading out a collage of porn spam he’s received, trying and failing to keep a straight face."

I guess I'm going to have to watch this. (It's always nice to get a valid excuse to watch a dirty movie.)

Brian May and the History of the Universe, plus News of the World Tastefully Sued by Heather Mills, White Stripes Suit, Fatboy Slim, Juliette Lewis

• Brian May is planning to write a "history of the universe." I hope in the book-on-tape version they use the music from Flash Gordon.
• Heather Mills is suing London's News of the World for printing that she was a "high-price call girl" for "rich Arabs." Even if it were true, at least she never stooped so low as to work for the News of the World.
• More suits, though this one is red and white: James Diamond, who worked with the White Stripes on their first couple of albums, is suing them. He won't win.
• Fatboy Slim is asking his fans to make their own videos for an upcoming single. I think it would be a good idea to synch it up with the video for the Housemartins' "Happy Hour."
• Juliette Lewis has a very Advanced take on drug use, which she calls "boring." Good for her! (Using drugs is Overt.)

The Strokes Have Mercy, plus Thom Yorke and Henry Rollins, Bob Mould Reports to the Dance Floor, "Dirty Water" Suit

• The Strokes have reportedly recorded a version of Marvin Gaye's "Mercy, Mercy Me" with Eddie Vedder and Josh Homme. Easy, fellas.
• Thom Yorke will appear on The Henry Rollins Show to talk about his new solo album and his newfound love of Christina Aguilera. (Wait, that's me.)
• Bob Mould has announced the release of a "dance/pop" album called Blowoff. Welcome to the world of Advancement, Mr. Mould.
• The Standells aren't standing for Budweiser's using "Dirty Water" in commercials. Why a beer would want to tout dirty water is beyond me, but you'd think they'd at least ask to use it.

Portastatic or Sportastatic?

As you know, liking sports is Advanced. With that in mind, go over to Portastatic's blog to read all about the hockey playoffs. This doesn't make them Advanced of course, and it could be argued that liking hockey is Overt because it is a borderline fringe sport in America. Plus, I don't know much about their music. However, I still say kudos to them!

Thanks to The View From Fort Miley!

Lou Reed: Wighting for the Man

I've seen a couple more stories about the Isle of Wight concert, and I think that Lou Reed's performance might have been a little more interesting (and Advanced) than the article in NME suggested. It's been called bizarre and disappointing, and there was also this: "...the most anticipated star was Lou Reed who played as unpredictable a set as you'd expect, frequently deviating into experimental jams, sandwiched between classics such as 'Waiting for my Man' and 'White Light/ White Heat.'" Now I really wish I had been there. Anyway, it sounds like he's mixing up his set from the show I saw last year, which is great news. Could a new phase in his Advancement be on the way? We can only hope.

If anyone saw the concert, please feel free to send me your take.

Bob Dylan in "Modern Times," plus New Bob Seger, Mick Jagger Gets Another Home, Music Critics vs. Bloggers, Instructional Genius

• Bob Dylan's next album will be called Modern Times. Some journalists were allowed to listen to it but not write about it. That's kind of nicely perverse, isn't it?
• Bob Seger is all set to release his first album in 11 years. He says it is "more rock'n'roll than usual." Is there another "Kathmandu" in our future?
• Because of Mick Jagger's insatiable desire for real estate, Sir Rodney and Lady Ouida Touche are homeless. Nice job, Mick.
• Music critics apparently have had it with the only people lower than themselves in the journalistic hierarchy, music bloggers.
• Some incredible genius has spliced together three music-instruction videos. The outcome is incredibly satisfying. It really is one of the best things I've seen in a long time. (Thanks to Music Thing)

Lou Reed at Ilse of Wight

NME wrote a longish thing about some bands and Coldplay at Isle of Wight, mentioning that they covered Lou Reed's "Perfect Day." This is what they said about Lou's performance:

"Earlier with the sun-setting, Reed himself played a well-received evening set. Joined on stage as usual by his Tai Chi master, the former Velvet Underground leader revisited early parts of his career including 'I'm Waiting For My Man' and 'White Light/ White Heat.'"

I don't have to tell you that I'm sad I wasn't there for that and that having your Tai Chi master with you on stage is incredibly Advanced.

Friday Videos, Love Thy Bassist Edition

Let's continue our appreciation of the bass with bands that are known for their bassists, starting with "Tom Sawyer" by Rush. Then...

• "Jerry Was a Racecar Driver" by Primus.
• "Vietnam" by Minutemen (live). Video quality is crappy, but the sound is pretty good.
• "Sex Machine" by James Brown (live). Okay, I've forgotten about the "bands famous for their bassist" bit so we can enjoy this. I'm pretty sure you won't be disappointed by the bass playing. Plus, check out the sweet 'stache!
• "Think" by Aretha Franklin from The Blues Brothers. Hey, that was on my list! This is getting fun.
• "Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now" by the Smiths. More from the list!
• "Radio Free Europe" by R.E.M. on David Letterman. List!
• And finally, "The Real Me" by the Who (live in '79). Go Thunderfingers!

Celebrity Winter Advice From Geddy Lee

Since it's bassist-appreciation day, let's have a look at this "Hilariously Comical Tobagganing Safety Public Service Announcement by Rush's Geddy Lee" (or so says the YouTube poster).

The Ten Greatest Bass Parts of All Time

This isn't really the ten greatest of all time, but it is a list of my ten favorite bass parts that I can recall off the top of my head. The playing might not be that sophisticated and the songs aren't necessarily my favorites (though I like them all), but all these bass parts deserve close attention. So let's hear it for the bassist! The list:

• "Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now" by the Smiths. The way it moves effortlessly through the song, the rising little bass chords sprinkled throughout, the little hiccupped descending part, it just kills me. He really used his noggin on this one.
• "The Real Me" by the Who. Okay, this isn't exactly understated, but it is some of the the most insane playing I've ever heard. Plus, the tone is quite nice.
• "Taxman" by the Beatles. There are several I could have chosen by Paul McCartney, but this one blows my mind. I think he always ramped things up when George Harrison wrote a song just to prove how awesome he could be. Whatever the motivation, the guy wrote incredible bass parts.
• "Under Pressure" by Queen and David Bowie. It ain't fancy, but how many bass parts can get into your head like that? "Another One Bites the Dust" could have made it here too, but the guys doing construction in the apartment listen to it a lot, so I can't help but hate it a little. It will pass.
• "Think" by Aretha Franklin. Without making too much of itself, the incredibly active bass is the driving force behind this song. If I may mix metaphors, the bassist really deserves his propers on this one.
• "Radio Free Europe" by R.E.M. Specifically, the run in the "Straight off the boat" (or is it "bus"?) part. When I was learning how to enjoy music other than classic rock, this bass part leapt out at me as something "different." It was actually life changing, I'm not afraid to say.
• "Mountain Song" by Jane's Addiction. Totally simple, but you should try playing it some time. It's really fun.
• "Waiting Room" by Fugazi. This guy has written so many great parts, but this is the one that really stands out as I sit here sifting through my bass memories. Also really fun to play, by the way.
• "Bridge Over Troubled Water" by Simon and Garfunkel. Call me a romantic (or a cheese ball), but when you hear that fat bass come in, preparing you for the "sail on silver girl" line, how can you not get chills?
• "Walk on the Wild Side" by Lou Reed. You didn't seriously think I'd leave this one off, did you?

I know I'm missing thousands, but let's just leave it at these ten. Feel free to add your choices in the comments section.

World Cup Man, plus the Who at Hedgestock, Sunny Afternoon Remake, Slayer Fans Celebrate Special Day, Loving the Bassist

• As I'm sure you remember, embracing sports is Advanced. But before you embrace the World Cup, you need to hear this.
• At Hedgestock, the Who met the new boss, and he was a nerd.
• The Razorlight/Ray Davies collaboration on a new version of "Sunny Afternoon" may turn out tacky, but you might want to learn how it came about.
• On 6/6/06, Slayer fans did what they do best: desecrate in the name of Satan (and vicious metal).
• There is a rare tribute to bass players in The Guardian. More to come on that later.

Isle of Wight Bans World Cup, plus Ray Davies and Razorlight, Kinky and Willie, George Jones and Merle Haggard, Steely Dan and McDonald Get Organic

• The folks at Isle of Wight are too Overt to allow the World Cup to be shown on the grounds of the festival.
• Ray Davies is worried that his collaboration with Razorlight on a rerecording of "Sunny Afternoon" will be tacky. Not worried enough not to do it, though.
• Kinky Friedman has announced that Willie Nelson will be a part of his administration if he is elected governor. Does that make him the Overt candidate or the Advanced candidate? Hard to say.
• George Jones and Merle Haggard are going into the studio together. I wonder how much whiskey those guys have drunk between them.
• Steely Dan and Michael MacDonald are just going to see what happens when they get out on the road. My prediction: Grass will be smoked.

Right Said Fred Opens World Cup, David Bowie on "Extras," Ozzy's Sex Life, Who Wants to Work for Billy Corgan, Cure's Back Catalog

• Right Said Fred will open the World Cup. Europe is so much more Advanced than America.
• David Bowie is going to appear on Ricky Gervais' show Extras. Please let them sing "Dancing in the Streets."
• Ozzy Osbourne's sex life has been affected negatively by the anti-depressants he's been taking since his four-wheeler accident. I'm impressed that his sex life hadn't been affected until then (with all the drug use and alcoholism and whatnot).
• For some reason, there are two people who want to play bass for Smashing Pumpkins. I can't think of a more thankless job than that. Well, maybe brother of John Fogerty.
• Rhino keeps updating and expanding the Cure's back catalog. This makes me wonder: Where will record companies find extras when the next recording format is invented?

Weird Amps, plus Qtrax, Burn and Alanis, Smokey Robinson for Fitness, Brian Eno at Bestival, Yo La Tengo: Ass Beaters

• I've always loved crappy but cool-looking guitars. And now I think I've found a new source for my amplifiers. (Thanks to Ektopia)
• EMI is launching a new ad-supported P2P called Qtrax. Why do all electronic devices have to have names like that? I think it's time to go back to the "walkman" style of naming.
• Morissette and Reynolds have split. Did Burt not learn anything from the Loni breakup?
• Smokey Robinson is telling people that you have to be fit to sing well. Coincidentally, he also has his own line of health food, so you don't have to shop around.
• Brian Eno will be making a guest appearance alongside "world music star," Rachid Taha, at Bestival. I dont' know much about any of that, but I do know that embracing world music is Advanced.
• I can't tell if the title of Yo La Tengo's next album is Overt or Advanced. It's called I'm Not Afraid of You and I Will Beat Your Ass. What do you think?
  

Lou Reed: Infidel, plus Young Alice Cooper, Sonic Youth Rules Universe, Norway Hates iTunes, Y-String Guitar, Nutty Professor Musical

• A new friend of Advanced Theory Blog sent me a couple of interesting comments: "What was more advanced than Lou Reed performing the Bob Dylan bootleg, Christian classic 'Foot of Pride'?” and "Lou Reed once said in an interview that his favorite Dylan was the Slow Train – Infidels period." So nice when people get it!
• Cool Noise wants you to remember that Alice Cooper used to mean something different. Of course, we love golfing Alice, but it is good to have a reminder of why we love him.
• The world's most Overt paper, the Village Voice, proclaims Sonic Youth as "the best band in the universe." That may be true, but I still can't listen to them for more than fifteen minutes at a time.
• Norway's ombudsman says iTunes DRM is illegal. I didn't know countries had ombudsmen. Wait, should I have one?
• Something tells me this guitar is going to show up on stage with a lot of Advanced musicians.
• I'm just going to copy and paste this because nothing else is needed: "Jerry Lewis, who played 'The Nutty Professor' in 1963, has a wacky new scheme: staging the film as a Broadway musical. The first show is planned for January at the Old Globe Theatre in San Diego, where the 80-year-old comedian has a houseboat, he said."

Cheap Trick Does It Again, Again, plus Babies Love 666, Hi-Def Radio, Chris Isaak Prefers Sex to TV, David Byrne More Interesting Than I Am

• Cheap Trick has a new album with an Advanced trait: They have two songs, "Come On Come On" and "O Claire," whose titles they've already used. But the songs are totally different.
• If you want babies to call you, change your number to 666-6666. And you thought it was the number of the beast.
• I'll bet you didn't know that you need a high-definition radio, but you do.
• Chris Isaak says big-screen TVs are bad for your sex life. But what about high-def radio?!?
• Why are you reading my blog when you can be reading David Byrne's journal?

Heather Mills Tasteful Nude Photos, plus Linda McCartney and the Smiths, Online Only Obscurities, Beck, Gene Simmons Is a Real Prince

• Heather Mills denies that she posed for pornographic pictures. Guess Paul McCartney plays hardball when you want a quarter of his stuff.
• Meahwhile, in other Mrs. McCartney news, Linda turned down the Smiths' request that she appear on The Queen Is Dead. Thinking that she was a bad musician and singer is Overt, by the way.
• Looks like record companies have finally figured out that people like to buy music online and that this is a profitable thing for record companies, even if a band doesn't sell as many records as Aerosmith.
• Stick a fork in Beck's next record.
• Gene Simmons has some interesting thoughts about Machiavelli and naked women.

Starbucks Inside the Aural Kiosk, Gorillaz in the Mist, Mork and Mindy Movie, Costello and Tuissant, Mogwai

• Starbucks has another wonderful idea for music lovers that probably won't work. But god bless 'em for tryin' to squeeze every last penny out of us! (By the way, why are they so obsessed with kiosks?)
• I didn't know Sigourney Weaver even knew Damon Albarn.
• Mork and Mindy Movie? I know you're thinking it might be a big piece of shazbot, but anything that brings Pam Dawber back on the scene is fine with me.
• Elvis Costello is extending his tour with Allen Toussaint. He must have seen An Inconvenient Truth.
• Mogwai's next record will be available only as a download in North America. At this point, that's kind of like trying to be interesting by being a teetotaler.